WorldWide Drilling Resource

19 WorldWide Drilling Resource ® MAY 2013 Relationship Tips by Tim Connor Games, games, and more games! “When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth.” George Bernard Shaw For years, I have been observing the games people play in relationships re- gardless of their nature; marriage, failing relationship, new relationship, platonic relationship, or romantic relationship. Be- fore I continue, however, I must admit I have played a few myself and been the recipient of many during my adult years. Exactly what are relationship games? They are generally manipulative tactics to achieve avoidance, control, or power. In the world of sports, almost every event from playing tennis to ping pong involves a competition which usually im- plies a winner and a loser. Relationship games are no different. There is usually a competition for attention from the other person, getting even with them for some reason, or punishing them for some un- expressed motive. Many game players are passive- aggressive while others are just insecure, but most let their ego rule their behav- ior and ultimate outcomes. In the end, all game playing wastes energy, time, resources, and causes emotional pain of some kind. There are too many types of rela- tionship games to begin to list even the more common ones. I can tell you, if you are a game player, you know who you are; and if you are on the other end of any relationship games, you most likely know it or should by now. So, why do people feel they need to play games in their relationships? If you are a long-time reader of my tips, you know I generally don't answer many of the questions I pose or topics I share. You know my intent is not to tell you what to do or how to do it, but only to ask you to think about the topic relative to your attitudes, feelings, or behaviors. This one is no different. So here are a few questions to consider: 1. Are you in a relationship (and I don't care how long it has lasted) where game playing is prevalent? 2. Are you a game player in your relationship, or is it your partner; or are both of you guilty? 3. When you play a game and you win, is the price worth it? 4. When you get involved in a game and you lose, how does it make you feel about yourself, your partner, and your relationship? 5. Do other people see the games being played in your relationship, but neither you nor your partner seem to be aware of them? 6. If there is a lot of game playing in your relationship, who tends to start them most often? Who is the loser most often? Now you need to do a little work. In His service, Tim Tim’s weekly tips may be found at www.timconnor.com or contact him via e-mail at admin@ worldwidedrillingresource.com Connor trans. cont’d on page 22.