WorldWide Drilling Resource

21 WorldWide Drilling Resource ® MAY 2015 &% ! "" * "(%$ ))) (" $( ' & $ %# # " (" $( $ ( " !" !! ! &% ! % ! (" $( & $ $ $ " ! $ $ ! ! $ ! $ # $ $ $ The Un-Comfort Zone II by Robert Evans Wilson, Jr. Words vs. Actions Are a person’s words or actions more important? I have an extremely intelligent friend with incredible insights into history and politics. He might have become a bril- liant professor, but when he was 14 years old, his grandmother told him he wasn’t college material. Believing her, he didn’t go to college, and has spent his life working in dead-end clerical positions. Another friend was told by her alco- holic father, when she was about 12 years old, that she was too fat to be a gymnast. Until that moment, she had been very successful in gymnastics. After the com- ment, she dropped out of it, and suffered from anorexia nervosa for a number of years. I have seen photos of her at that age, and she was not fat by any stretch of the imagination. Who knows what demon caused her father to make such a statement, but to this day she still struggles with her body image. On several occasions, my father praised my writing ability, but when I said I wanted to be a writer when I grew up, he would tell me I could not make money from it. I love writing, but I have been conflicted about my passion ever since. In a previous article, More Powerful Than You Know [ WWDR October 2008], I wrote about the power of praise, and how just a few words can change some- one’s life. When someone, whom we consider to be an authority, tells us some- thing - good or bad - about ourselves, we accept it and make it part of our internal belief system. If it is good, we go on to succeed. If it is bad, we fail or struggle to get ahead. Has someone important in your life said you were ugly, stupid, or clumsy? Or were you told you were attractive, smart, or clever? Whichever you heard, especially if you were a child at the time, you probably accepted it as fact.Thewordsor labelswe’re given can too easily map out our lives. Alternately, there are times when actions speak louder than words. When I was growing up, my mother doled out words of love, but the actions weren’t there to back them up. She was more neglectful than abusive, but she was both. I was frequently left to fend for myself as she pursued her interests. She expected me to attend her needs, but my actions were seldom reciprocated. Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts , explains people communicate love in different ways. He says a person may like to experience love in one or more of the following ways: physical touch, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of serv- ice, and words of affirmation. According to Chapman, when you find your signif- icant other’s favorite love language(s), you have discovered the key to making the relationship last. Mine has always been quality time, but I like most of the others as well. We are frequently wooed by the words of politicians, but then when they get elected, they seem to immediately forget their campaign promises. Later, we are frightened into voting for them again and again, because we fear the words of their competition. We teach them only their words matter, so they continue to paint beautiful pictures in our minds with words, then do nothing to bring them to fruition. Advertisers, on the other hand, usu- ally fulfill their promises. As many in business know, there is nothing like good advertising to drive a bad product off the market. Meaning: an effective ad campaign will get a lot of people to try a new product, but if it doesn’t meet the expectations created by the ad, the prod- uct will quickly fail. Which do you find more important, words or actions? Robert Robert is an author, humorist, and innovation consultant. He works with companies that want to be more com- petitive and with people who want to think like innovators. For more information on Robert, visit www.jumpstartyourmeeting.com or contact him via e-mail at michele@ worldwidedrillingresource.com