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Disappointment is not an Outcome ~ It’s a Process by Tim Connor Ever been disappointed? We all are sooner or later, and some of us more often than others, and more often than nec- essary. What exactly is disappointment, and what are its pri- mary contributors? Also, why do we set ourselves up for it? Disappointment is the feeling of sadness or displeasure caused by the nonful- fillment of ones hopes or expectations. Get it - the single biggest cause of disap- pointment is the expectations we want or need to happen, or feelings we have when we have been let down by others or circumstances. Let me briefly explain the title, as I believe expectations and their outcomes are more of a process than an outcome. We want something to happen - a returned phone call, e-mail, or text response, someone to show up on time for lunch - whatever - and we believe/feel it should happen due to our own needs, desires, or situations and then - BAM - nothing. So we get upset, angry, hurt, or yes - disappointed. I call it the "disappointment - setup". Can it be avoided? Yes, but there are a few conditions which must be present. First, we have to grasp the simple concept we are not in control of others or their actions, responses, timing, or agendas. Second, we must accept the world doesn't revolve around us. Third, we must nurture patience, which is not an easy task for control freaks. When I say disappointment is a process - it starts with us and how we turn over control of our feelings, behavior, decisions, or actions to others or circumstances. It doesn't just happen, it builds slowly as time passes and you wait for responses, actions, decisions, or outcomes you want from others or life in general. I don't care if it's a late or cancelled airline flight, the weather that messes with your weekend plans, or simply routine traffic while on the way to an important meeting - it's all the same - stuff happens. If this concept is not ingrained in your con- sciousness, I will guarantee you spend a great deal of time in a mind-set of disappointment. The other factor is the stress caused by these situations, and if you are not aware of the negative impact of this, let me tell you everything in life is a stressor - a wedding or a divorce, winning the lotto or filing bankruptcy, getting fired or starting a new position - and the body doesn't separate negative from positive stressors - they are all the same. Stress isn't what is hap- pening, but how you choose to respond internally to what is happening. Notice I said "you choose". Yes, disappointment is a major contributor to stress, and again its primary causes are the expectations you bring to any and every situation or person. What can you do to eliminate or reduce your disappointments? Simple folks - let go emotionally of the things you can't control. Accept that life happens, and not always according to your agendas, schedule, or needs. I'll share one of my life mantras with you - "I will be excited if it happens, but I won't be disappointed if it doesn't.” In His service, Tim To receive Tim’s weekly FREE moti- vational booster articles, contact him at www.timconnor.com with “please add me to your free booster e-mail subscriber list” in the subject line. Or contact him via e-mail to michele@ worldwidedrillingresource.com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orldWide Drilling Resource ® If you chase two rabbits, you will lose them both. Native American Proverb