WorldWide Drilling Resource

14 DECEMBER 2020 WorldWide Drilling Resource ® Temporary Truth and the Consequences 2 by Tim Connor I finally figured it out. The single biggest issue contributing to poor communication, increased conflict, negative relationships, ineffective employee performance, declining health, bad decisions, lost business, ineffective management, and declining organization success (need I go on?) - is simple but not complicated. In a word, it is “reality or truth” and not what was true, but what people wanted you to believe was true. When you deal in truth, you have a better percentage of better outcomes than when you deal in “Temporary Truths” or lies. Let me explain. Everyone has opinions, values, attitudes, prejudices, and beliefs grounded in personal experience, upbringing, conditioning, and education. When blended into a person’s mindset, these create their personal sense of reality; what is, what is right, what is wrong, what needs to change, etc. The problem gets even worse when people begin to believe their sense of reality (the previous stuff and more) is THE “reality”, in other words - all other views, opinions, attitudes, beliefs, etc. that disagree with it are wrong, outdated, stupid, unnecessary, or invalid because they are different than theirs or challenge theirs. Imagine for a minute the last conflict you had with an employee, spouse, or customer - I will guarantee its source was the attempt by both of you to validate your own opinion(s) and invalidate the other person’s. Due to current trends in political correctness, social media, and the selfie generation, we are very rapidly losing the ability to develop meaningful relationships grounded in respectful acceptance of different opinions, values, beliefs, etc. - both business and personal - that are grounded in openness, understanding, tolerance, and respect. So, what’s the answer? Well, there are a few things we all need to understand if we are going to deal in truth going forward. Let me just give you a brief overview as I’m sure you have other things to do. Fear - Fear is the most powerful emotion in life. When we let others use it with lies or lack of truth, we give them power over us until the fear leaves us. The hundredth monkey effect - This concept says that once an idea, rumor, concept, or invention hits critical mass, it is spread quickly as truth regardless of its validity. The need for control - Many people today will say or do anything that gives them perceived control or power. The problem is, if their actions are not grounded in truth, eventually they will fail and lose this power or control. Just look at global dictators over the years who have disappeared. The need or desire for approval or acceptance - Many people today want to be liked and respected, and want friends and connections who will “friend, like, support” them. Let me ask you, how many connections do you have on Facebook or LinkedIn who you don’t know at all, but call them friends? Arrogance and ego - People who are driven by ego and arrogance will often do or say anything that helps them maintain their reputation (no matter how dishonest it may be), control, or ability to influence others. Just look at many politicians today. Insecurity - If people feel insecure, they will often say anything to help them manage their insecurity. Denial - Denial is simple. It refuses to accept reality, truth, or any situations or circumstances that are. Criticism avoidance - Often, people will avoid the truth, endorse untruths, or just stay quiet for fear of losing their job, career, a relationship, or even their health or safety. Assumptions - Assumptions are stupid. When someone tells you something and you don’t question it, you give them power over your ideas, actions, beliefs, values, etc. Uncertainty and change - When life is uncertain or changing, people fear the future. They want reassurance or support that all will be well. This is why many people use fear as a technique to control others. If they can keep you in fear mode, they can control you. Lies work, and why? Because we let them and don’t have the courage to challenge them. Ripple effect - The ripple effect is like an ocean wave. Ideas, lies, misrepresentations, etc. continue by the simple rule of endurance. Manipulation - People will often use their version of the truth to keep others in circumstances they can control. Just look at certain countries today with populations under siege and there seems to be nothing they can do to change them short of a revolution. Here’s a quick real-life example from my past. Many years ago, I spent the holidays with the family of a client and friend. We were talking one night and he asked me, “Tim, what do you think about reincarnation?” My answer, “I don’t know much; I just know I don’t believe in that hocus-pocus.” His response, “How can you have such a strong opinion about something you don’t know anything about?” I have never forgotten that conversation, and never will. So, what current truths do you believe are impacting your life or choices and decisions, and how do you define truth? In His service, Tim Tim Connor may be contacted via e-mail to michele@worldwidedrillingresource.com Looking for Events? Click on this box in our online issue worldwidedrillingresource.com

RkJQdWJsaXNoZXIy NDk4Mzk=